Here I Go Again
by Rotehexe
Summary: Being a personal Chopping Block was not what I thought my life would lead to. Now here I am in the arms of Opie Winston, the guy who cut into me still on the loose. I didn't know what the hell was going to happen but I did know that my brother and Opie would not let the guy live when they found him. Opie x OC


**_A/N: So it is rare that I put a A/N at the start of the story, but I wanted to make a note here. I do not own the Son's, I only have my own thoughts and OC. This is not 100% Cannon Compliant either. Does not truly follow the show. Also there is a lot of triggers, the first Chapter alone has torture, but also a slight bit of fluff at the end. I am weird I own it, and love it. BTW this is a OpiexOC pairing. I also have another SOA FF that is a ChibsxOC and a JaxxOC called Coming Home._**

 ** _Check out my profile for the link to my Facebook where I post all updates about posting and everything there._**

 ** _Reviews are gold to me!_**

 **Chapter 1: Here I go Again**

 ** _Two Weeks Ago…_**

Standing in front of the wall of mirrors usually gave me all the confidence in the world. Letting the music flow through my body as I moved with the beat, the sweat dripping down my skin as I moved through the routine. I lived for learning new moves and seeing how my body moved in the mirror. Because if it looked good there, then it looked good on stage when I danced in the background for the acts. See I was a background dancer for a lot of artists. It was legit; I could dance and choreograph with the best which was good because now I was legit, nothing illegal, nothing bad, nothing that was going to put me in the cross hairs of a damn gang war.

Today my life changed though; today my confidence went out the window as I saw the blood spilling to the floor of my apartment in front of my mirrors. The gag in my mouth keeping me from screaming out loud enough for the neighbors to hear, but I wished they could then mainly the pain would stop. I could see myself in the mirror as I was tied up on my stomach as the cuts felt like they got deeper. I tried to get away but every time I struggled the grip he had on me grew tighter. My long red hair was soaking up some of my own blood from the floor.

'One man, it is just one man...'I thought to myself, but one man was tearing me apart. The knife felt dull slicing into my skin, my tears on my face didn't do much to make the man stop but I couldn't help crying and screaming into the gag with each cut. My back probably looked like it was ran through a meat processor.

"Bitch you are so stupid…" the guy said and I tried to remember who it was. I knew the voice and it was driving me insane that I couldn't name the person. He was in a black ski mask as he carved into me, and I tried to think of everything else but what was happening.

It was the middle of the month. Wait… middle of the month. I craned my neck trying to see the calendar I had handing on the far wall, and as soon my baby blue eyes saw the date I started to laugh so hard I was crying. Maybe just maybe I would be saved, today was the day my brother came to visit, and when he found out I was hurt, an entire M.C. would be out for blood.

"Slut why the Fuck are you laughing?" The man who sat on my legs hissed as he dug the knife further into my back. I couldn't tell him why, hell I didn't want to, I just hoped that I was right, and I would survive. The world began to black out on me, everything felt fuzzy for a moment before it all went dark.

"Chrissy! Chris common!" Jax yelled pounding the door. My pickup sat in the driveway so that meant I was home, I didn't live in walking distance of much. But hearing him pounding on the door as I began to open my eyes and tried to move, taking in the pain I groaned as I looked back in the mirror, the word DIE was written in, what I assumed, was my blood. But the man was gone, I felt weak and unable to move well. I tried to scream out but the gag was still in place and my arms where still bound. But my legs and feet where free, thinking fast, which was hard since my brain was shutting down it seemed I tried to move close to the mirror. With all the force I could muster I kicked at the mirror hard, and after what seemed like forever, but in reality was only about six tries one of the mirror panels came crashing down, which caused me to scream into the gag feeling a mirror shard lodge into my leg. Great yet another injury on the ever growing list.

I heard the front door get kicked in, and I closed my eyes loving the feeling of the dark for a moment until I felt hands on me. I cried out when my hands were released from the binds, and I tried to look up when I felt hands on my gag. My eyes locked with those who belonged to Opi Winston.

"Ope." I hissed as I felt Jax looking over my back.

"You are gonna be fine sweet heart." He said and gently cupped my cheek trying to make sure I kept my eyes on him instead of the mirror.

"Ope, call an ambulance… and get rid of your cut." Jax said taking his off and moved grabbing Opie's as he walked by and moved stuffing them in the closet under a box of things in there.

"Chrissy, who the fuck hurt you?" Jax asked kneeling down in front of me now when Opie walked away to make a call.

"I don't know, Jax I wish I did…. He.." I tried to keep talking but I started to cough and groan in pain. I was loosing way to much blood I knew it, even without my nursing degree I knew it. Yes I was a dancer by heart, but I needed a money making job when being a backup dancer didn't pan out or there was a lul, which happened more then you think. So I got my nursing degree, which my dad thought I got to help the club but I didn't, I got it to fall back on for myself.

"Darlin' what did he do besides…" Jax waved his hand to finish his statement as I heard the sirens coming.

"I don't know everything… Blacked out a while ago. He was here before I blacked out, woke up to you pounding the door." I said and hissed.

The EMT's came rushing in and started to check me over, I cried in pain as they tried to patch me up before transport but there was too much damage.

"We will meet you there sweetheart." I heard Opie speak as I was loaded into the ambulance. I was still on my stomach so I didn't see them when I was loaded. But I knew from that moment on I was never leaving the M.C. lifestyle.

The rest of the night was a whirlwind, I passed out in the ambulance, only to wake up in a room with really bright ass lights.

"Five more minutes." I mumbled feeling really good, not even remembering I was hurt until I tried to move.

"Sweetheart you have been out for two days." A male voice came from the side of my bed. I grunted a little, which I was sure was very un-lady like but I didn't care, as I moved looking at a very haggard looking Opie. I smiled weakly and then sighed hearing the booming voice of my dad in the hall.

"they been here long?" I asked him and sighed.

"Got here while you were in surgery."

"Surgery? It was that bad?"

"Guy who attacked you got you good, babe. He is going to die when I get him though…" the man said. I grew up with Opie, I knew him inside and out, just like I did my big brother Jax. I knew a lot of the guys in the club, till I talked to my parents and agreed that leaving would be best for me. I was seventeen when I went away to college up in Washington, granted I had the Tacoma guys watching my back often, it wasn't all the time.

"What did he do?" I whispered almost scared to think of how my back looked.

"He carved into you babe, he carved the word…" He paused and ran his hand over his face. "He carved Whore into your back, then random lines and gouges. He was hoping you bled out from the looks of it."

I didn't even know I was crying until I felt Opie wipe my tears and made me look at him. "We will get him Chrissy, I promise you babe."

Just then the door busted open and there stood my parents.

"Baby, oh my god." Gemma my mother said rushing to me.

"I am alright… I think they got me dosed on really good pain killers. " I say trying to calm her down, she was almost in hysterics, which was causing me more pain, as she held me. "Mom… I said good… not amazing." I breathed.

"Gem, let the girl go, she was just tortured." Clay said standing there with his arms crossed. "Hi sweet angel.." He finally spoke to me.

"Hi Dad, before you ask, I will tell you like I told Jax. I don't know who did it…"

"Jax told me, and we will find him my sweet angel and when we do, we will torture him more then he did you before he dies." Clay grunted. I may not have been around for the past seven years, but I was still the princess. "Until then, you are coming home to Charming." And I wasn't about to argue, I wasn't safe alone anymore, today proved that.

 ** _Present day_**

I was still sore as hell, I had to get my back cleaned and rebadged daily, but thankfully Chibs was able to do that, so the doctor cleared me to go home. I needed crutches to walk since that mirror messed up my leg so I was just one hell of a mess. Opie was there he brought his truck to pick me up this time, which was better than the van they used to transport the bodies and crap, it always creeped me out.

Walking out, or I guess I hobbled out to the parking lot I saw a ton of bikers, from Charming, and Tacoma, even a few from Nevada. I couldn't help but smile as I made my way over, only to have Opie move and gently pick me up. It hurt no matter what but walking was hurting me worse than being in his arms. The cheers made me blush a little, I was so not used to this anymore.

"You ready to go home babe?" Opie asked and I nodded leaning into him.

"Take me home Ope, it has been way too long."

Setting me in the passenger seat of his truck he helped me get settled for the long ride home. Jax came over and checked on me handing me a pack of smokes which I knew had at least three joints in it, which I asked for to help me relax for the damn ride. I wasn't a heavy smoker, but I enjoyed it , especially now when I needed help relaxing.

"Gem is throwing a party for you when we get there." Opie explained when he pulled out and onto the road.

"Great, a club full of fucking croweaters… how is this a good homecoming for me?"

"Well you get to meet Juice and the prospect, they stayed in Charming with Gem, so did Pop." He explained. "Other then that, you get me at your disposal."

"Sure you wouldn't want to get yourself a croweater?" I asked as I grabbed a joint and lit it up taking in a drag.

"Nah, after Donna left me I kinda went through a faze where I fucked almost every girl in the club, now I don't really want to touch them with a ten foot pole." He said and shrugged.

"One extreme to another." I stated and offered him a drag. I knew he wasn't stupid enough to get so high he couldn't drive but we both could relax a little.

"Eh, besides it has been seven years since we hung out babe, we should hang out a bit, and I am sure most the other guys will be indulging in the crows tonight."

"You sure you aint rooting for the other team?" I teased him and laughed a little before hissing at the pain in my back.

"Nah babe, still get hard for the right women." He said and even adjusted his cock in his jeans as he drove.

"I just went through a meat grinder Ope, you would have a hell of a better time getting a crow eater then waiting for me to A. heal, and B. be alright to ever be intimate again. I know he didn't… rape me.. thankfully… but his hands where on me, in places, he all but stuck his dick me." I sighed and shook my head. The rape kit came back negative thankfully, I was so scared that I was raped but that at lest didn't happen.

"And I will do as I please babe, and I want to spend my time with you, now will ya let me?" He said and smiled at me. I always had a crush on him, and I knew Donna did to, I never did like that bitch. She was always so against Opie and his wishes, no wonder they divorced after only two years. Thankfully no kids for him with her, which would have been a fucking disaster. I knew Ope wanted kids, but Donna was not the girl to provide that for him, one day he would get an old lady that would provide for him what he needed.

"You are so sweet old man." Teasing him about our age difference always made things enjoyable.

"Babe you are a grown ass women now, just because I am older then you don't mean I don't have the stamina of a teen."

"One day I may make you prove that…" I said then regret the words and sighed. "Doubtful though." I didn't want to get his hopes up, hell I didn't want to get my own hopes up because I wasn't sure if that would be a good idea or not.

"You won't always be scared sweetheart." He said and put a gently hand on my knee. I was used to his touch, he rarely ever left my side since I was there. He only left for two days to go to Charming take his bike and pick up his truck, since I refused to go home in the van.

"Maybe." Was all I was going to say on the topic. "Imma nap a bit, since Mom wants a party it means I will be passed around like some trophy." I sighed and shook my head before I laid down a little. I adjusted using a jacket he had on the floor and bunched it up as a pillow and soon I was asleep with the rumble of the bikes all around me.

"Lass, it is about time to open those pretty blues." I heard Chibs talking to me but it took a moment to register why he was talking to me and not Ope. Finally opening my eyes I saw Ope next to me holding me close to him and away from the door as Chibs stood in the doorway blocking the view from everyone else. Thankfully since I wasn't sure I wanted everyone to see me passed out in the truck as my first impression back.

"Can't I just go to Ope's room and sleep some more?" I mumbled and tried to stretch without a hiss.

"Sorry Lass, Gemma want's the party in full swing soon, But I need to check your back before that happens." Chibs said gently and looked her in the eye.

"Alright Chibby, How about Ope's room, it's about the only private spot we will get, and I really don't want to be on display." I muttered and with help I got out of the truck and used my crutches heading inside. Thankfully, Clay and Gemma kept most of the charters at bay, including Charming so I could get cleaned up before the party.

Up in Ope's room there was bags out the ass of clothes and I looked back at the two men who came up with me. "Gem went shopping, I told her you could stay in my room as long as you wanted since I won't use it much accept for sleep." Ope explained as he cleaned off the bed.

Standing infront of the bed I sighed and started to pull the shirt off my head, I needed it off for Chibs to do what he needed. "This is not my most shining moment." I said and stood there shirtless, gauze patches all over my back, some looked pink or red while the rest white.

"Looks like some of your stitches are pulling Lass… lets have a look. May be best to lay on your stomach, and hold onto Ope. I don't have anything to numb to the pain accept whiskey and painkillers." Chibs warned.

"I can handle pain Chibby, lets just get this over with." I stated. Ope moved getting on the bed and spread his legs and I moved slowly up the bed and laid between his legs my head on his thigh. "If anyone walks in it would look so wrong." I stated and laughed. Now that I was on my stomach the pain wasn't so horrible.

Chibs began to take off all the gauze putting it in a bag to be burned, and started to clean every cut and stitch.

"Think Hap can tattoo over the scar when its healed?" I asked. I never thought I would get a tattoo, but I didn't want the word whore to stand out on my skin, especially not since I was a dancer, and half the time my back was on display.

"He probably can babe, whatever you get will take up your entire back though." Opie said and I nodded. "I know, but this is a good reason as any to get a really big tattoo… Go big or go home." I teased and clutched his hand tight as I felt Chibs take out a popped stitch then start to fix it.

"You would look hot as fuck with anything you put on you." Opie added trying to keep me distracted.

"I hope so, cause being a dancer I will be on full display." I stated.

"Dancer? Lass when did you start to be on a pole?" Chibs asked.

"Not stripper Chibby, Dancer. Like pop hiphop, breaking, popping, locking… Things like that." I stated a laughed. "When I am healed maybe I will show you."

"You will have to lass, only dancing I know is when the women get naked."

"Well that is because you are a very dirty old man with very low standards when it comes to the art of dance."

"Oi Lass, I am a dirty man, but you still love me."

"I do Chibby, I do, but I will open your eyes to dance one day when I can move again." I felt him digging again and I clutched into Opie more turning my head into his leg to hide the pain on my face. Hearing the door open I didn't even move, I knew it looked horrible, Chibs straddling my thighs as he worked my back, my head almost between Ope's legs, and from the door it looked horrible.

"Sorry… Clay wanted me to check… I will tell him your busy." A voice I didn't know said.

"Juicey, tell Clay we will be down soon, just need to wrap her back up." Chibs stated.

"Juicey?" I asked and looked back trying to see the kis but he was already out the door and so I laid there relaxing on Ope till Chibs made me stand and wrap my back up again.

"He is the newest patch…" Ope explained holding me steady, before he moved grabbing a SAMCRO t-shirt from his dresser and offered it to me which I took happily since it was large and loose on me. No one would be able to see the bumps of gauze on my back.

I went without the crutches, even though I had a nasty limp with the cut on my leg, no way would I be able to walk with crutches with a full clubhouse. Holding Ope's arm he helped me out and down to the main room where Clay stood and started to clap. Soon as everyone saw me there was cheers and claps and I started to move to the bar.

A few of the guys in Charming's Chapter came up and started to give me hugs, they all knew exactly what happened so they knew they had to be gentle.

"Hi Uncle Tiggy." I said as the crazy man with curly black hair came over and hugged me gentle.

"You grew up Princess… fucking smoking hot." He said and I laughed a little, knowing Ope was still close in case I needed him.

"In your dreams Tig, your sexual fantasies are a little… odd, to say the least." I tell him and moved over hugging Bobby when he came over.

"You look good girl." Is all he said to me which was nice, so I was able to move on and get over to Piney who was sitting in the corner. "Hi old man." I said and he pulled me close and it felt like he didn't want to let go.

"You better not go anywhere again sweet Angel. Not sure my boy could handle it." He said and I looked at him confused as hell.

"You have been smoking way to much, old man." I stated and laughed as I walked over to the middle of the bar and with a little help since my leg didn't want to hold a lot of weight I got onto a stool and the party got started.

Hap finally came over and we sat there talking for a while about him doing a tattoo on my back in a month or two when she was healed up.

"You know its going to hurt like hell." He said and looked at her.

"I know, but If I can taking being a carving block, I can take a tattoo." I stated blandly as I downed the shot that was set in front of me.

"If I ever find the guy he will be tortured." Happy promised.

"Sorry brother, that kill is mine." Ope said from behind me putting a hand on my hip and pulling me back a little letting my back hit his chest.

"I didn't realize you two were together." Happy smirked and downed a shot.

"We aren't… yet." Ope stated and I looked back at him with a brow raised. "Told you I would do what I pleased." He reminded.

"Cocky much?" I asked and shook my head but didn't move from my position I was comfortable and felt safe.

"Only with you." He teased and I saw Happy smirk and head off to some random blonde crow eater.

Jax walked over with his arm slung around a very familiar brunette.

"Round two?" I asked and shook my head grabbing the bottle of whiskey this time and took a long drink before handing it to Ope to share.

"Don't sound like mom." Jax stated pulling Tara into his lap.

"I aint mom, I refuse to be there to pick your ass up if this shit falls apart again. Last time it took Ope and I a few months to pull your head out your ass. Don't need another suicide mission." I stated.

"I didn't want to commit suicide, you know that is the fucked up way out." Jax huffed and Tara knew better then to say a word to her.

"I know, doesn't mean you didn't try to get someone to kill you when you were on Runs. Pretty sure Ope and Chibby still have the scars from taking bullets for your stupid ass." I explained and took the bottle again letting the feel of burn go down my throat.

"I don't plan on leaving again." The voice came through and I wipped my head to her.

"Better not hurt him again Tara, I can be your best friend, or your worse. I may not have been in the life the past seven years, but I can still kill without blinking if I need to." I warned.

"I am not leaving him." Tara said sternly.

"Believe what you want hunny, He is in the MC. You want him out, unless you support the life you won't make it."

"Do you support Ope?" She asked me and I smirked.

"I support all the guys, I ain't with Ope. If I was we would work it out. I support the MC, I know what they do, how they live, it is who they are."

"But would you be happy with him fucking around when he was on runs."

"If I was with Chris I wouldn't need to fuck around."Ope was the one to speak now which shocked me. "I can be faithful for the right girl, I was faithful to Donna." He pointed out.

"There is you answer." I said and shrugged. "now if you excuse me," I said and slid off the stood taking Ope's hand and limped over to my mom and dad.

"You two look chummy." Gemma said pulling her daughter in for a gentle hug.

"Ope is like my personal body guard, and very comfy pillow." I said with a smirk leaning into Ope's side letting my bad leg relax a little as we stood there.

"Mmhmm, seems much more then that." Gemma said and I rolled my eyes.

"Ma I was just used as a damn carving bored, I am not about to jump into a relationship when I feel like a damn processed meat. Ope is sweet, and its nice to have a comforting hand around when I need it. Do I want to be around him a lot? Yes. Do I want to share a bed with him right now? Yes, because he makes me feel safe, and besides Jax or Chibs, he is the only one in this club that won't push me." I stated crossing my arms just like she normally did.

"Alright mini Gemma, let's get you introduced to Juice since he said he walked in on a very interesting threesome involving you earlier." Clay smiled at his daughter and called over Juice.

Soon this tanned skinned man with a mowhawk and lightning bolts tattooed in his head came over.

"Juice, Christiana, or we all call her Chrissy or Chriss. Princess this is Juice." Clay said with a rough hand on the boys shoulder.

"I hear you enjoyed the view earlier." I teased him and smirked. "Maybe next time you can join us." I cooed wanting to see his reaction.

"Wait, what?" Juice asked and looked wide eyed.

Ope smacked him on the back of the head before Clay squeezed his shoulder harder. "She was getting her back cleaned by Chibbs you moron." Ope said and shook his head. "I was trying to keep her calm and hold her still." He explained to the kid.

"Yea, may want to get your facts straight before you run your damn mouth…boy." I said and shook my head before I saw another boy walk over with the prospect cut on and I laughed a little. "Least I came back to see another prospect who needs to be broke." I teased.

"Name's half-sack." The man said with a smile.

"Did I ask for your name?" I said and leaned into Ope. They usually had me give prospects hell growing up and I still did when I cold even if it was just on the phone or something.

"No ma'am" he stated and looked down.

"Next time wait until you are spoken to." I stated then smiled. "Hey, you will figure it out." I added and patted his back before I looked at Ope.

"Common big boy, lets go my leg is hurting to much." I said and started to limp to the couch, but Ope was quick and picked me up carrying me to the couch with him instead of letting me walk. I relaxed into his touch and let him set me on his lap as I took in the site. Everyone was either fucking, sucking, kissing or trying to get there.

"Sure you don't want to partake in that?" I asked after we sat there for a while.

"Nah, I got who I want to spend the night with." He said and moved my hair out of my face.

"You are not being subtle with your flirting Mr. Winston." I stated and laughed.

"When we grew up together I had to watch it, cause you were underage. Gem and Clay wouldn't of said a word, but if Unser saw I would have been in jail in a heart beat." He stated. "but now you are of age, and I can flirt and tell you the truth all I want until you tell me to stop and leave you alone."

"You are different since you divorced Donna." I pointed out.

It was true, she saw Ope and Jax once a month for a day ever since she left home. Donna never liked him coming to Washington to visit me but I never cared, what the bitch thought, and the day he divorced her he came to visit me. Said he needed an escape, and honestly I needed him just as much, that moment I needed to be held since I got turned down for a huge gig, and I felt like my life was in a downward spiral.

"Not really different babe, just it opened my eyes." He stated.

"Take me to bed Ope, alcohol and pain killers, I need to lay down." I said letting his words start to sink in. I wanted to ask what it opened his eyes to but at the same time I was really nervous to find out. So I chickened out and wanted to go to bed instead.


End file.
